You are the sum of 5 people you spend the most time with
Today I thought I pay it forward by sharing some wisdom with you that I only recently learned.
Have you heard that saying?
Well I had not, but once explained, it made so much sense to me. Since then I have been trying to ensure that I spend time with people that bring into my life only positivity, joy and fulfilment.
I had a bad day a few weeks ago.
It actually started as any other average day does. I got up had coffee with my husband and set about my day in a happy mood. That day I was planning to catch up for coffee with some friends and before I left to meet them Andrew asked me if I really wanted to still catch up with them.
At the time I was upset with him, I said they are my friends why wouldn’t I?? When I got back from my catch up I wasn’t in my happy mood anymore. I didn’t notice that as much as when Andrew brought it to my attention.
He had asked me how the catch up went and why I was in a “mood”. Naturally, I reacted to that straight away in defence “What do you mean? I’m fine! I don’t know what you are talking about”. That got him annoyed and he told me that every time I met with those friends I was alway in a bad mood. I dismissed that and didn’t want to talk about it any more.
The next day I had caught up with another friend of mine for a walk. She asked me how my day went and as I proceeded to tell her, I admitted that Andrew was right. My whole day had been set off my usually positive course and all of that happened during the catch up I had with those friends.
And then she told me that it all made sense because “You are the sum of five people you spend the most time with”
What does that means?
Well in short it means that who you spend your time with influences the person you are or the person you eventually become. Who you are with, can influence you positively as much as it can bring you down.
This isn’t only applicable to feelings and emotions you may experience after spending time with friends but also to your life overall.
For example think about your life, is it how YOU want it to be? Are you allowing your self to flourish or are you being held back because of how the people around you think you should live, what you should feel or judge your self worth?
You may never pursue a change of career because your friends think you are crazy for leaving your “perfect” job even though, deep down, you are not happy with what you do.
You may never work up the courage to talk to the boy you like because your friends joke with you and make you feel like you are not worthy of him, when in fact you are.
You may never take the plunge and purchase the round the world ticket because the people you spend time with think it’s insane to quit your job for the sake of a holiday.
You may decide to pursue the life you know you are meant to lead because the people surrounding you are encouraging, positive and ready to help in the way they can.
Or in my case, the day of my catch up with my friends, I spent a significant part of my day talking about their fears & worries which I internalised my self and when I got home was “moody”. When in fact my day had started happy and positive with a great person who supports me no matter what.
Now equipped with this knowledge I have sworn to my self that I will make a conscious effort to surround my self with people that are a positive influences in my life. I don’t need people who will make me feel insecure, scared and worried about my current situation. I don't need anyones help in raising doubt, self pity or victimisation of myself, IF I wanted to feel that way I can do it all on my own.
Instead I choose to be happy!
I choose to be positiv!
And, I choose to hope for the best outcome in life, because that is the type of life I choose to live!
I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject. Are you surrounded by positivie people in your life or have you like me persisited in being freinds with people beacuse you thought you had things in common or have invested too much time into them that now you feel it's too late to quit?
It is never too late to start living the life you want!!