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Me, my self and my saboteur

Have you noticed that as soon as you make a commitment to do something, that annoying inner voice pops up and instead of cheering you on does everything to deter you from your set goal?

Without going too much into the philosophy of the "Ego" and how that inner voice or yours is NEVER positive in attitude, I have been thinking that in order to progress in my mission I need to find a way to communicate back.

In the past, even when I was sky high with motivation to follow the diet/fitness plan of the day, my inner voice would always bring me right down to my knees. It was always a race against time, how long I'll endure the bulling before I succumb and give up?

Much like a school yard bully, if you get told enough times that you are not worth it you eventually begin to believe it. My inner voice however is smarter then your regular school yard bully. My voice uses reverse psychology on me.

"Have the cake you deserve it you have been sooooo good!" OR "Have the cupcake (or four) it's been a hard day" OR "You can afford to stay at home and relax today. You deserve the rest you went to the gym two days ago"

This time around I'm just as determined as any other time, but this time I have accepted the fact that I need a new approach to succeed. I need to outsmart my inner voice!

For that I have enlisted the help of my aunty, who by chance is a physiologist. And she told me three very interesting things:

  • Our life is a stage of many actors and personalities (and no, not the kind I loved in "Me, Myself and Irene" and "Fight Club")

  • What my inner voice tells me to do as "reward" is actually "punishment"

  • In face of something that scares us the inner voice is the loudest screaming to STOP in order for self preservation.

I'll talk about point 2 and 3 in another post. Today it's all about my life stage and it's actors.

My aunty asked me "If you were a spectator in a theatre watching a play about the "day-in-your-life" what would you see?"

Well I see me on a health kick and in constant battle with my inner voice. She had me describe the actor on stage that represents that inner voice and who else I can enlist to help me through the time of weakness.

Over time we have all give way too much power to that negative inner voice, the one that is so good at sabotaging every attempt we make at changing our self. And for the purpose of my play I call it The Saboteur.

So here are "me, my self (the motivator) and my saboteur."


Now every time the saboteur enters the stage and tells me

"Wee Wee Vanyaaa, ave zee cake you deserve it, you ave been so good, no?" I call on my motivator to run in and she tells me "You are what you eat so don't be fast, cheep, easy or fake and even if you loose 250g a week that is 13kgs this time next year.....just keep going!"

So every minute of my day is a battle of wills and hopefully it'll subside as time passes and the saboteur realises that he is NOT the the boss of me.

Try this out your self and you'll see that you will be able to manage your temptations better then before. I find my self pushing back on my self sabotage and choosing healthier choices more often during the day then I did before.

I know it's only early days, but it's working so far.

What does your saboteur look like?


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